Daniel in Vietnam: Goals (More accurately, why I'm here)

So, as of last May, I was all set. I had deposited at Columbia, had a job for the summer, and had wrapped up a (by my standards) happy and successful college experience. In late May, I got accepted off the waitlist to spend a year in Vietnam on a Fulbright. Needless to say, it was a drastic change in planning.

I went from scouting out cool apartments in Morningside Heights to checking out weather patterns in Vietnam. I went from worrying about how'd I do in school (as a student) to how'd I do in school (as a teacher). I went from worrying about "learning to love the law" to worrying about learning Vietnamese. It was a tectonic shift in my thought processes.

Many people (including my parents, relatives, and close friends- but interestingly, never my brother) wanted to know "Daniel, why the heck do you want to go to Vietnam?" People asked, "Isn't this a step laterally career-wise?" People asked, "Why teach?" and they asked "Why Vietnam?" People asked me "Daniel, why do this at all?"

In this post, I want to outline, for you and for me, my goals for this year. I've tried to have has few as possible (maximizing my chances of achieving them) but of course, the longer I've been here, the more I want to do!

1. Take a Year Off/Gain Work Experience

Boom. Done. I am very young for my grade, and if I went straight through from college to law school, I'd be even younger. While I was prepared to do that, it was not preferable. Being 21 and competing with highly mature, successful, and intelligent people in their late 20s and early 30s- people with substantial work experience and work ethic? Yeah, I saw that as a losing battle too,

Basically, the idea was to get older, work for a little bit, and come into law school having already had a full time job (or, in my case, three quarter time). I'd still be one of the younger students, but instead of being in the bottom 2%, I'd be in the bottom 35% (Columbia has about a third of its class come straight through from undergrad). While I still won't compare to the 30 year old father of two, at least I'm not at the very bottom any more!

I consider this goal achieved. I've now been a 3/4 time teacher for about a month (well, 5 weeks) and I will continue for the next year (well, 8 months). I'll have work experience and I'll be a little bit older.

2. Travel

I love to travel (have I mentioned that I did Semester at Sea yet?). I love it, I love it, I love it. Unfortunately, travel is both expensive and time consuming. So, when I deposited at Columbia, I knew I was putting the kibosh on any international travel for a while, surely the next 5-6 years. I couldn't travel in law school, and I would need several years afterwards to pay back my loans (hard to justify travelling internationally with massive student loan debt, I think). I was OK with this reality. Law school is what I want to do. (When I watch documentaries like Gideon's Army, or envision life as a District Attorney or Public Defender, I get excited and energized!)

Still, I was a little sad knowing I was closing the door on travel until my late 20s. So, when the opportunity to have someone else (Uncle Sam) pay for year of international travel, it seemed like a great opportunity! I had never been to East Asia (the only country in Asia I had been to was Israel, if you count that as Asia) and Vietnam was definitely way farther out of my comfort zone than anywhere I had been before. Plus, a year was a lot longer than I had spent anywhere else (the longest in any one country was Israel, at two weeks).

Boom. I consider this accomplished. I have traveled!

Before coming to Vietnam, I was very strict in not compiling a list of places to "check off" because I didn't want to feel disappointed if I didn't get to any. Of course, now that I'm here, I definitely have a list!

Hanoi (DONE)
Ho Chi Minh City (Saigon)
Hue
Da Nang
Da Lat
Ha Long Bay
Hoi Ann
Sapa (DONE)
Fuqua
Dien Bien Phu

Needless to say, I have a long way to go! I have plans to go to Dien Bien Phu, Ha Long Bay, Hue, Hoi Ann, and Da Lat this semester, and I'll probably save the rest (plus some more cool places) for next semester.

Unfortunately, I can only leave Vietnam with permission, and only for 14 days of the 10 month grant (which makes sense, it ends up being like 5% of the total time- the U.S. Government is paying me to be here, they don't want me gallivanting around SE Asia). However, afterwards I want to check out SE Asia (Cambodia, Thailand, Laos, Malaysia) and Oceania (Australia + NZ -got to get that 6th continent!)

So, this is my list, I'll come back to it in January and see how it looks!

3. Personal Growth

I feel like I'm a generally alright dude. I have no complaints with who I am, but I also know that I have room to grow! I figured that this year would be a perfect proving ground for doing so. I'm on my own, doing a bunch of new stuff- growth is inevitable, right?

Mostly, I want to better tolerate uncertainty and known unknowns. I hate not knowing stuff and in Vietnam, thats all the time. I understand only 4% of what I see and 1% of what I hear so I'm guessing most of the time.*

In America, uncertainty and being wrong drive me insane. I love being efficient and planning ahead. In Vietnam, all you can do is be early because almost assuredly a) I'm in the wrong place, b) they misunderstood me, c) class was cancelled/moved, d) something else. Nothing is ever on time or on schedule- partially due to language barriers, but partially due to Vietnam's flexibility. Nothing is ever set in stone.

One story on that. I had been invited (and accepted) to dinner at a teacher's house. 30 minutes before, the Vice Principal of my school called me to invite me to dinner. I told him I already had plans and he asked with whom. He hung up, called her and told her to invite me a different day. So, he called me back and told me I had dinner plans with him and his family now. Power dynamics man. Power dynamics.

Or, consider the fact that I get my schedule for teaching on Sunday morning (for the week starting on Monday)- and still I have multiple classes get cancelled/moved the day of, every week. So far, I've been diligent about asking, but I've heard many stories of people going to class only to find it cancelled.

So, hopefully this year I get more mature (whatever that means) and better able to tolerate change/ become more flexible.

*I still worry if I am getting the "full" living abroad experience if I don't understand whats going on! I've resolved that, mostly, by understanding that even if I don't understand everything, I'm still getting more than I would have this year at Columbia in terms of understanding Vietnamese culture.

4. Minor Goals

Get shredded. Workout all the time!

Learn Vietnamese at a conversational level. We'll see. its a very difficult language. Right now, I can speak and listen if someone speaks very slowly and we stick to very basic topics (classroom stuff, my family, America, the weather, how my day is going, food, etc).

Transition from undergrad to postgrad- basically, sometimes this feels like a study abroad semester. I need to realize and focus on the fact that undergrad is over, and expend energy maintaining the friendships that I want to keep

Conclusion

It kind of seems like I've already accomplished these goals just by coming here! And thats true- I don't really have any goals for the year. I'm just here to get older, get some work experience and see where the experience takes me. It s a very new, somewhat frustrating concept for me- I'm usually very goal-driven, very future-oriented. I'm just here to experience what I can and try to enjoy it. The more checklist-y I get, the more stressed I'll be.

Coming soon- a recap of my first month in Lao Cai!

Onwards. Always Onwards.
Daniel